25 Questions to Ask Your Manager in Your Next 1:1

The most valuable 1:1 questions focus on feedback you can act on, your promotion trajectory, and the context your manager has that you don't — not status updates that belong in Slack.

Your 1:1 with your manager is the most important 30 minutes of your week. It's your time—not theirs, not the team's—to get feedback, align on priorities, and advance your career.

Yet most engineers waste it on status updates that could have been Slack messages.

Here are 25 questions that make 1:1s actually valuable. Pick a few that fit your situation and come prepared.

Why 1:1s Matter

Before the questions, a quick reframe: your 1:1 is not a status meeting. If your manager isn't actively supporting your advancement, see when your manager isn't advocating for you — the questions below can help diagnose and address that situation.

Your manager already knows what you're working on (or should). Status updates waste the precious synchronous time you have together.

Instead, use 1:1s for:

Getting feedback you can act on
Understanding context you wouldn't otherwise have
Discussing your career trajectory
Building a relationship beyond tasks

Come with topics prepared. If you walk in without an agenda, you'll walk out without value.

Questions About Your Performance

These help you understand where you stand and what to improve.

1. "What's one thing I could do differently to be more effective?"

Specific, actionable, and focused on improvement. Much better than "how am I doing?"

2. "If you were doing my job, what would you do differently?"

Invites perspective without putting them on the spot about your performance.

3. "What's something I did recently that worked well?"

Helps you understand what to double down on—and validates that your manager noticed.

4. "Is there anything I'm not doing that you'd expect someone at my level to do?"

Reveals blind spots. Often surfaces expectations you didn't know existed.

5. "How would you describe my reputation on the team? In the org?"

Perception matters for promotion. Better to know now.

6. "What feedback have you gotten about me from others?"

Sometimes your manager hears things you don't. This opens that channel.

Questions About Growth and Promotion

These keep your career top of mind—for both of you.

7. "What does the path to [next level] look like for me?"

Direct and important. If your manager can't answer this, that's a problem.

8. "What's the biggest gap between where I am and the next level?"

Focuses the conversation on your most important development area.

9. "If you were writing my promotion case today, what would be the strongest points? What would be weakest?"

Helps you understand how your manager sees your candidacy.

10. "What opportunities could I take on to demonstrate [specific skill]?"

Shows initiative and helps you find stretch opportunities.

11. "Who else in the company should I learn from or build a relationship with?"

Expands your network beyond your immediate team.

12. "How do promotions actually work here? What's the process?"

Many engineers don't understand the mechanics. Understanding the system helps you navigate it.

Questions About the Team and Company

These give you context that helps you prioritize and navigate.

13. "What's keeping you up at night right now?"

Understand your manager's concerns. You might be able to help—or at least avoid making things harder.

14. "What should I know that I might not be hearing through normal channels?"

Invites them to share context they might not volunteer.

15. "What's the most important thing our team needs to accomplish this quarter?"

Helps you align your work with what matters most.

16. "What's changing that I should be aware of?"

Reorgs, strategy shifts, leadership changes—better to hear early.

17. "How is our team perceived by leadership?"

Gives you insight into the broader context you're working in.

18. "What does success look like for you in your role?"

Understanding their goals helps you support them—which is good for everyone.

Questions When Things Feel Off

Sometimes you need to address problems directly.

19. "I've been feeling [frustrated/stuck/uncertain]. Can we talk about it?"

Naming the feeling opens the conversation. Don't suffer in silence.

20. "Is there something I should be doing differently that we haven't discussed?"

Sometimes managers hold back feedback. This invites it.

21. "I'm not sure I'm working on the right things. Can we review my priorities?"

When you're feeling misaligned, ask for realignment.

22. "I've noticed [specific issue]. What's your read on it?"

If something seems off—team dynamics, project direction, organizational weirdness—ask about it.

23. "How can I be more helpful to you?"

Sometimes the best way to improve your situation is to improve theirs.

Questions to Build the Relationship

These make your 1:1s more human and your relationship stronger.

24. "How was your week, really?"

Not just small talk—genuine interest in your manager as a person.

25. "Is there anything I can do to support you?"

Shows you see them as a person with challenges, not just a resource for your career.

How to Use These Questions

Don't ask all 25 in one meeting. Pick 2-3 that fit your current situation:

If you're new: Focus on performance questions (#1-6)

If you're targeting promotion: Focus on growth questions (#7-12)

If you're feeling uncertain: Focus on context questions (#13-18)

If something's off: Use the direct questions (#19-23)

In every meeting: Sprinkle in relationship questions (#24-25)

What to Do With the Answers

Asking questions is only half the value. The other half is acting on what you learn.

Take notes. Not during the meeting necessarily (that can feel weird), but immediately after.

Follow up. If your manager suggests something, do it. If they mention something to watch, watch it.

Track patterns. Over time, themes emerge. Pay attention to feedback that repeats.

Hold them accountable. If they promise to do something (get information, make a connection), follow up on it.

When Your Manager Doesn't Show Up

Not all managers are great at 1:1s. Some cancel frequently. Some make it all about them. Some give useless feedback.

If your 1:1s aren't working:

Give feedback. "I'd find our 1:1s more valuable if we could focus on [X]."
Come extra prepared. Sometimes you can make a bad meeting good by driving it yourself.
Supplement elsewhere. Find mentors, sponsors, or skip-levels who can give you what your manager doesn't.
Recognize when it's broken. If your manager consistently fails to support your growth, that's a data point about your future at the company.

Your career is too important to let a weak manager relationship hold it back.

Track What You Learn

Seekersy helps you capture feedback, action items, and patterns from your 1:1s—so nothing falls through the cracks.

Start Tracking Your Career Conversations

Key Takeaways